Ghostmann’s Angry Comic Book Review of the Month: Justice League #5

Foreword: Sometimes you just gotta vent and writing a pissed off review is WAY more fun than writing a serious one. Lucky for me there are a lot of shitty comic books out there on the stands. Here’s one of them….

Sorry, I’m not in the best of moods as I write this review right now so bear with me – there could be a multitude of expletives spewing forth.

This comic is fucking stupid.

In a world of great team books like Marvel’s Uncanny X-Force, The Ultimates, and even DC’s Justice League International, I would be embarrassed to have my name on the cover of Justice League #5. What the fuck is going on with Geoff Johns here? Seriously, I’m not joking. There needs to be a goddamn intervention quick. Hey Mark Waid, Rick Remender, and Jason Aaron, your fellow comic book writer has hit bottom. You need to reach out to him and let him know that he’s not only hurting himself but the people he loves. It’s time to sit down, guys, and write a letter to Geoff reminding him of the good times, and also letting him know that if he continues to write shit like Justice League #5 the following will happen: comics written by Geoff Johns will no longer be welcome in your house. If Geoff Johns calls and wants to do a cross-over with your comic you will turn him away.

This has to be a cry for help. How else can you explain, “WE GOT THIS!”

Holy mother fucking shit of Christ I can’t believe he wrote that. I can’t believe I paid 3.99 to read that.

I don’t who the fuck these heroes are in Johns’s Justice League. That sure as shit isn’t Batman. Dude takes off his mask in the middle of Metropolis!!! And then tells Green Lantern, who is the ultimate D-Bag, his real name and origin!

There is also an imposter posing as Wonder Woman in this book. I mean there has to be. This must be part of the plot Johns has set up right? Because that is not the Wonder Woman I know, or have read or seen in any comic, movie, TV show, cereal box, toy store, EVER!