Tag Archives: Game of Thrones

You Win or You Die: Season 6, Episode 8 Scoring Update

If I had the opportunity to put money down on one of our rostered characters getting offed in “No One,” I would have done it. Luckily, I did not have said opportunity, and therefore am not quite as upset about the lack of action.

Still, show writers Weiss and Benioff are giving us all the signs that these last two episodes could go completely nuclear, especially with Dany finally returning to Meereen; I doubt that siege is going to last much longer with Drogon subbing in. He doesn’t look like he has any jokes.

I’d like to pour one out for our deceased members of the waiver wire: characters who had appearances in season 6 that would have been allowed to be picked up next season, but have now passed on to the great beyond. Here’s to the Waif, Blackfish, Lady Crane, Khal Moro, Osha, and Ian McShane. Oh, and how can I forget this kid?

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#ollysdeadface

It’s safe to say there’s a select group of characters who are in real danger this coming weekend, and judging by the title of the episode, “The Battle of the Bastards,” I’m betting a majority of the full 60 minute episode will take place near Winterfell, with the Jon and Ramsay bout serving as the title card.

And the undercards we should be worried about? I’m going with Harold Karstark, Brienne, Sansa, Ser Davos, Podrick, and Tormund. There’s obviously plenty of people in King’s Landing who are in deep trouble, but I think this episode is going to focus too heavily on the north for me to make any educated guesses on people in the Red Keep, or Essos for that matter.

Standings Week 8

Full scoring update is below. Continue reading You Win or You Die: Season 6, Episode 8 Scoring Update

You Win or You Die: Season 6, Episode 7 Scoring Update

So after a relatively quiet Episode 6 we get….an even more quiet Episode 7. But not without intrigue!

Most importantly; CLEGANE BOWL IS ON, BABY!!! “The Broken Man” brings back everyone’s favorite anti-hero, Sandor Clegane, aka The Hound. Will he get a chance to reclaim his honor and defeat his Franken-brother, The Mountain?

I have to say I was pretty disappointed with Arya this week. She decides to tell the Faceless Men to go pound sand, and then just skips across Braavos looking for a ship to sail back to Westeros? Arya, you already know the Waif has it out for you and can mimic literally anyone’s appearance. A girl needs to keep her guard up! Because when you don’t keep your guard up, you get stabbed in the abdomen and thrown off a bridge.

Briennes over Bronn only scored one point, but it was a big point. Finally scoring for his namesake, we got the first appearance of Bronn. The Big Three (Jon, Sansa, and Davos) weren’t able to do much in the way of bolstering their forces, leaving Sansa to call upon Littlefinger(?) and get the Knights of the Vale on her side.

Meanwhile, Theon and Yara are posted up in Volantis with their fleet, happy to be away from the gloomy Iron Islands and their huge-lunged uncle Euron. Well, at least Yara is.

Margaery makes it clear she is still on Team Tyrell after passing her secret note to Olenna. After seeing the post-show teaser for the next episode, it looks like whatever Margaery has planned might finally come to fruition next week.

Only three episodes left. We’re now on the home stretch. We’ve still had no Sand Snake sightings, or heard literally anything from Dorne for that matter. However, I wouldn’t count them out. I’m expecting the Martells to make a surprise appearance in the series’ historically insane penultimate episode. You heard it here first!

Standings Week 7

 

Full scoring update is below. Continue reading You Win or You Die: Season 6, Episode 7 Scoring Update

(Don’t) Dine with Tyrion

This week’s segment will be a little different. After Tyrion is captured by Catelyn and her men, on their way up North, Tyrion has to sit and watch his horse being butchered.

“None of us will go hungry tonight,” Bronn said. He was near a shadow himself; bone thin and bone hard, with black eyes and black hair and a stubble of beard.
“Some of us may,” Tyrion told him. “I am not fond of eating horse. Particularly my horse.”
“Meat is meat,” Bronn said with a shrug. “The Dothraki like horse more than beef or pork…”
Chiggen grinned, showing yellow teeth, and swallowed the raw meat in two bites. “Tastes well bred.”
“Better if you fry it up with onions,” Bronn put in.
Because I don’t have a scrumptious horse recipe lying around, let’s skip dining with Tyrion this week. Let’s talk about what to drink instead.

Continue reading (Don’t) Dine with Tyrion

You Win or You Die: Season 6, Episode 6 Scoring Update

I had to spend two days, TWO WHOLE DAYS, trying to avoid spoilers for Episode 6 during my return home from the Sasquatch Festival this weekend. Luckily, not much happened while I was out.

I was very pleased to finally get an APP point from Lancel, but more curiously, did you see that absurd weapon he was brandishing? Come on, that thing’s gotta do something interesting!

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While my team still holds a commanding lead, “Blood of My Blood” has me thinking that a few teams are ready to make serious moves. With Jaime demoted from the Kingsguard and instead put in charge of leading the Lannister army, he is now primed to do some serious damage for LDG. However, no one should have more hope after this episode than MeanOldPig. Arya’s betrayal of the Faceless Men means the Waif and Jaqen have officially been added to her ever-expanding hit list.

I’m sure Masters of Cwnage is pleased to have a Valyrian blade now in his possession after Sam steals Heartsbane from Randyll Tarly, who has now taken the Throne of Total Dick Dads since it was vacated by Stannis.

Oh yeah, and rengstorff has a dragon again. Greaaaattt.

Standings Week 6

Full scoring update is below. Continue reading You Win or You Die: Season 6, Episode 6 Scoring Update

You Win or You Die: Season 6, Episode 5 Scoring Update

Last week I rather overzealously predicted five killings in this week’s episode. While my prediction was certainly way off, the emotional weight of losing the two characters that we did certainly felt like five.

While the death of Hodor was soul-crushing to say the least, it didn’t have much of an impact on the overall scoring. It was Hodor’s first appearance since we began so MMDG only lost out on one point. The real shakeup came courtesy of the Night’s King himself. Tyranofloresrex’s team got right back in the action with that huge kill of the Three-Eyed Raven. With the Night’s King getting the Kill Point and stealing all of the Raven’s Appearance Points, we are now starting to feel the brutal weight of important characters being killed off by other important characters.

It’s also likely we could have seen the last of a few characters for a while. Dany’s touching demand of Jorah to find a cure for himself could mean he might be out for the season, while Dolorous Edd holds down the Night’s Watch so the rest of the Wall party can go build themselves an army.

Standings Week 5

It’s MeanOldPig’s second death in three weeks, and while his gallows artwork was a fitting tribute to Ser Alliser, his Three-Eyed Raven has now officially set the bar for what we should be expecting after these deaths. MMDG’s “Hold the Door” tat just pours salt in the Hodor-sized wound in our collective heart.

Full scoring update is below. Continue reading You Win or You Die: Season 6, Episode 5 Scoring Update

Dine with Tyrion: Herb-Roasted Chicken

Let’s pick up where we left off, shall we. When Tyrion is journeying back down from the Wall, he runs into Catelyn at an inn at the Crossroads, while she is secretly traveling back to Winterfell from King’s Landing.

Lannister glanced at the nearest tables. “My men will have whatever you’re serving these people. Double portions, we’ve had a long hard ride. I’ll take roast fowl – chicken, duck, pigeon, it makes no matter. And send a flagon of your best wine…”
This week Tyrion recommends a roasted chicken. Pair with a flagon of your favorite Chianti.

Continue reading Dine with Tyrion: Herb-Roasted Chicken

You Win or You Die: Season 6, Episode 4 Scoring Update

Last Sunday was Bay to Breakers in SF, the only Sunday of the year you’ll likely see more rampant nudity than on Game of Thrones. After stumbling and bumbling our way home from the drunken masses, we were able to settle in and view episode 4.

While there were no important killings this week, we did get to see some new faces this season that helped bolster a few teams’ scores. The first appearances of Littlefinger and Sansa brought the Masters of Cwnage up to 9 points, tying for second place with Limb-itless. Jorah’s scaly secret is out of the bag now, at least for Daario, so that adds some additional intrigue to LDG’s team. However, it’s LDG’s last draft pick, Ramsay, who makes one of the biggest power plays in the episode that could bring this series to a boil. His letter to Jon Snow was ruthless, and having Sansa read the final bit aloud makes the battle for Winterfell seem all that much closer.

Standings Week 4

While the Mountain failed to show up to do any skull bashing, picking up an entire Dothraki army, I feel, was a fair compromise for rengstorff’s team.

It was a fairly calm episode overall so I’m assuming at least five people will die next Sunday.

Full scoring update is below. Continue reading You Win or You Die: Season 6, Episode 4 Scoring Update

Dine with Tyrion: Garlic & Butter Crab

A new episode is upon us. Although we aren’t sure who will die tonight (no one from team Limb-itless, that’s for sure), we can be sure Tyrion will have drink in hand. “That’s what I do. I drink and know things.”

Brought to you by Tyrion himself, or at least what I think he would say, is a new segment: Dine with Tyrion. Each week he will bring you a new culinary pairing from his adventures. This week his recommendation comes from his visit to the wall.

Mormont picked up a crab claw and cracked it in his fist. Old as he was, the Lord Commander still had the strength of a bear. “You’re a cunning man, Tyrion. We have need of men of your sort on the Wall.”
Tyrion grinned. “Then I shall scour the Seven Kingdoms for dwarfs and ship them to you, Lord Mormont.” As they laughed, he sucked the meat from a crab leg and reached for another. The crabs had arrived from Eastwatch only this morning, packed in a barrel of snow, and they were succulent.

Continue reading Dine with Tyrion: Garlic & Butter Crab

You Win or You Die: Season 6, Episode 3 Scoring Update

While some of us got back in to town late Sunday after spending time with our lovely mothers, we were still all able to sit down and enjoy our first episode since the start of the fantasy season.

Our Game of Thrones Fantasy League got off to a rip-roaring start last night with lots of  appearances from most of the initially drafted character pools. Only “The Rebels,” consisting of a few of the Greyjoys and Sand Snakes, did not make any appearances.

Scoring in the first episode saw four of the teams draw level at four points each. Even though Many Faced Team had the expected setback of losing Alliser Thorne this episode, they are still one of the four teams with four points. The lone kill point in this episode goes to Abominable Snow-Bran after Jon Snow, now free of his Night Watch duties, executes the traitors by hanging. That leaves Abominable Snow-Bran with a commanding lead of 7 points after taking away Thorne’s lone APP point.

Full scoring update is below.

The Teams:

Abominable Snow-Bran – hltchk (7 Points; 6 APP, 1 K)

GoT Ftsy Team MH
House Stark: Bran (1)
Team Targaryen: Missandei (1)
House Lannister: Tommen (1)
The Wall: Jon Snow (3)
The Old Gods and the New: Lancel Lannister (0)
Friends Like These: Olenna Tyrell (1)
Rebels: Yara (0)
Continue reading You Win or You Die: Season 6, Episode 3 Scoring Update

You Win or You Die: Game of Thrones Fantasy League

If you’re like me, you’re sick and tired of watching HBO’s Game of Thrones with all these “book readers,” smirking and nodding every time another character gets knocked off. Well, now that ol’ Balon Greyjoy has been tossed to his death, and the series has entered mostly uncharted territory, I think we’re all on even ground here. So it’s high time we kicked off a Game of Thrones survival-style fantasy league.

Our concept is simple, but feel free to expand and modify for your own GoT fantasy leagues. In this case, we’re banking on more characters getting killed off over the balance of season six (otherwise this won’t be too much fun). If history is any indication, however, that shouldn’t be a problem.

Nobody wants to draft me? Fine.
Nobody wants to draft me? Fine.

To honor The Seven, seven Idlers comprise the league, drawing from a player pool divided into seven groups. We started with a strictly defined number of available characters — 49 divided equally among House Stark, Team Targaryen, House Lannister, Old Gods and the New, The Wall, Friends Like These, and The Rebels. Draft strategy was going to be important. Since each team has to roster one character from each group, avoiding a guy like Ser Alliser meant you had to draft a different character from The Wall before you ran out of options.

We used draftlotto.com to randomly generate our draft order, but there are lots of ways to determine this, including some fun in-person draws that you can use to kick off your episode three viewing party on Sunday.

Scoring works thusly: starting with episode three of season six, each character earns one point per episode in which he or she appears. If a character dies at any point this season, all of those Appearance Points are voided. If the character was directly killed by another rostered character, then the killer assumes all of the Appearance Points that had been accrued by the victim up to that point and adds them to his or her Appearance Point total. Additionally, each time a character kills another rostered character, he or she earns an additional Kill Point. Kill Points stay with a character even if he or she dies over the course of the season, and cannot be stolen by another character.

The stakes: Each time a character on your team dies, you must immortalize his or her passing with body art. A quote, or artwork if you’re feeling ambitious. Level of permanence: Sharpie or better. Then, of course, share a pic with the world. Additionally, at the end of the season, the team with the highest point total takes home The Trophy. [We don’t know what that is yet, but rest assured we’ll argue about it over the next few months.]

The Teams:

Abominable Snow-Bran – hltchk

GoT Ftsy Team MH
House Stark: Bran
Team Targaryen: Missandei
House Lannister: Tommen
The Wall: Jon Snow
The Old Gods and the New: Lancel Lannister
Friends Like These: Olenna Tyrell
Rebels: Yara

Analyzing these groups was one of the most fun aspects of the draft. With the first pick, Jon Snow was the obvious choice (he can’t die AGAIN can he?), but also obvious for his group, as The Wall is a tough place to stick it out and I don’t imagine any of those characters lasting too long. And you know Mr. Snow is going to have a big kill or two. I was really surprised Bran and Yara dropped to me in the second round, so I quickly snatched both of them up with my back-to-back picks. I have no idea what to expect from Bran, but since he missed out on all of last season, I’m betting he appears in every episode this time around, with sweet new powers to boot. Yara, with her father killed by her uncle, is out for blood; hoping she racks up the kills soon. I felt like Tommen is a pretty safe pick. While being King doesn’t guarantee you safety as we’ve all learned, he is now surrounded by Jaime and Cersei, the latter of which has the Mountain at her beck and call. Tommen is Cersei’s last child left; she’s gonna give it all she’s got to keep him alive. He’s also excused from the whole mess the High Sparrows are investigating regarding Margaery and Loras. Olenna is probably not going to do much I imagine, and neither will Lancel. Missandei I’m a little worried about. While she does have the protection of Grey Worm, with Dany and Daario no longer around, I’m not sure how much longer she can last. I suppose it all depends on how quickly Tyrion and Varys can turn Meereen around.
Continue reading You Win or You Die: Game of Thrones Fantasy League